Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Randomize
