I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
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