do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Blood and glitter go together right?
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Randomize
