i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
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