easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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