have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
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