I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Randomize
