somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
I understand Curling. That high.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
