; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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