Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Randomize
