the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
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