So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Randomize
