What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
