Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Pants are for mortals
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize