Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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