Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
