wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
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