Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
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