i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
This couple is walking their pig around campus
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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