After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
i want to swaddle you in tequila
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Randomize
