You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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