Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
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