I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Naked. naked and bneed help.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
