Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
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