you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Randomize