Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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