I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
His nipple licking is glorious
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