Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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