hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
