wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Randomize
