He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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