I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
