Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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