Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize