OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
My Higher Power is John Stamos
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize