We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
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