She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
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