By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
Randomize
