there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
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