They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Randomize
