Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
Randomize
