i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
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