You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize
