At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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