Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Randomize