just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
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