It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Randomize
