I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
That was before I lit my hair on fire
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
