i just google imaged poop.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Randomize
