Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
