It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
